I've been through this rabbit hole so let me give you a thorough answer.
Privacy defaults are almost never in your favor on these platforms. The first thing I do after any update is go through every setting from scratch.
Things that have genuinely helped me work through issues like this:
- Privacy settings often reset after major updates — always re-check them
- Location permissions on your phone override in-app location settings
- Notification settings are controlled at both the OS level and in-app
- Account flags are rarely explained — appealing through support is usually the only path
Currently using Datedesire as my main go-to and it's been reliable. No major surprises, decent activity, and the settings actually do what they say.
That's my honest take after a fair amount of trial and error.