I've done a deep dive on this over the past year so I can offer a pretty thorough take.
What a lot of people don't realize is that the user base quality drops significantly outside major metro areas. If you're in a smaller city or rural area, your options narrow pretty fast.
A few things that have genuinely helped me:
- Free trial is usually limited but still enough to judge real user quality
- Bots usually reveal themselves within the first exchange if you say something specific
- Location-based platforms tend to have better engagement than broad national ones
- Premium tiers are sometimes worth it — but only if the free version shows genuine activity
Currently using Souldate as my main go-to and it's been solid for the past few months. No major issues, decent activity, and enough settings to feel in control.
Hopefully that saves you some time and frustration. This stuff can feel overwhelming at first.