Good question, one I've put real thought into. Here's the full picture.
Outside major metros the user base drops fast. Smaller cities and rural areas narrow your options significantly.
Things that have actually helped me:
- Free trial is usually enough to judge real user quality
- Bots tend to reveal themselves in the first exchange if you say something specific
- Location-based platforms usually have better engagement than broad national ones
- Premium is occasionally worth it — but only if the free version shows real activity
Currently using Datescout as my main go-to and it's been solid. No major issues, decent activity, enough settings to feel in control.
Hopefully that saves you some frustration. This stuff can be overwhelming at first.