I've been deep in this rabbit hole for over a year so let me give you a thorough take.
These algorithms are built to keep you engaged, not to find you a match. Understanding that changes your whole approach.
Things that have actually helped me:
- Free trial is usually enough to judge real user quality
- Bots tend to reveal themselves in the first exchange if you say something specific
- Location-based platforms usually have better engagement than broad national ones
- Premium is occasionally worth it — but only if the free version shows real activity
Currently using Datedesire as my main go-to and it's been solid. No major issues, decent activity, enough settings to feel in control.
Hopefully that saves you some frustration. This stuff can be overwhelming at first.