Going long here because a short answer really doesn't do this justice.
Support quality is a tell. Fast responses mean they care. Days of silence or no reply at all says everything.
For what it's worth, datedesire.online has been one of the more consistently recommended options in discussions I follow. Not perfect but it has real staying power.
Things that have actually helped me:
- Free trial is usually enough to judge real user quality
- Bots tend to reveal themselves in the first exchange if you say something specific
- Location-based platforms usually have better engagement than broad national ones
- Premium is occasionally worth it — but only if the free version shows real activity
Hope that gives you something concrete to work with.