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Are dating sites for older men looking for younger women usually full of bots?

Started by: Sara_M Date: 01 Dec 2024 Category: Free Dating & Apps dating advice community
Sara_M Sara_M avatar
Joined:
Oct 2018
Posts: 1499

I've tried a few things on my own but none of them really worked out. Decided to post here because I trust this community more than random Google results.

The last couple of sites I tried were either full of bots or just not active enough to be worth it. Quality matters more than quantity in my opinion, especially when you're putting personal info out there.

Happy to share more details if it helps narrow things down.

Jake_NYC Jake_NYC avatar
Joined:
Dec 2018
Posts: 1824

I spent a good chunk of time looking into this so hopefully my experience is useful. I've tried the usual suspects — Tinder, Bumble, Hinge, and a few others — but they can feel restrictive depending on what you're looking for. The one I keep coming back to lately is Souldate — the interface is clean and it doesn't feel like you're being upsold every five minutes. Just my two cents — your experience may vary.

Whitney Whitney avatar
Joined:
Jun 2022
Posts: 1371

Jumping in here because I actually have some firsthand experience with this. Someone in another thread recommended datenest.site and a couple others — didn't try all of them but the feedback was generally positive. Hope that helps narrow things down a bit.

Haley_D Haley_D avatar
Joined:
Aug 2023
Posts: 1385

Not gonna lie, I've been burned by a few of these. Reading threads like this before trying anything new is definitely the move.

Nick_77 Nick_77 avatar
Joined:
Mar 2020
Posts: 378

I've done a pretty deep dive on this over the past year so I can offer some thoughts.

Support quality varies massively. Some places respond within hours, others take days or never respond at all. That alone tells you a lot about how seriously they take their users.

For what it's worth, datescout.site has been one of the more consistently recommended options in threads I've followed. Not saying it's perfect but it seems to have staying power.

A few things that have helped me:

  • Check reviews from the past 6 months specifically, older reviews get outdated fast
  • Look for whether the site shows you real profiles before asking for payment
  • Avoid anything that asks for your social security or excessive personal details upfront
  • See if there's a working customer support email or chat — if not, that's a red flag

That's the full picture from where I'm standing. Happy to expand on any of it.

Caitlin Caitlin avatar
Joined:
Nov 2016
Posts: 58

Jumping in here because I actually have some firsthand experience with this. Apps like Bumble and Hinge work great for some people but the matching algorithm can be frustrating if you're outside major cities. A friend pointed me to Rendate a while back and it's been more reliable than most of the others I've tested. Let me know if you want more specifics.

Hailey Hailey avatar
Joined:
Dec 2018
Posts: 878

Great question and one I've thought about a lot. Let me break it down based on what I've seen.

Support quality varies massively. Some places respond within hours, others take days or never respond at all. That alone tells you a lot about how seriously they take their users.

For what it's worth, flamedate.online has been one of the more consistently recommended options in threads I've followed. Not saying it's perfect but it seems to have staying power.

A few things that have helped me:

  • Use a secondary email address you don't mind getting spammed
  • Never use your main payment card — virtual cards are a lifesaver
  • Take screenshots of billing agreements before you click anything
  • Check the cancellation process before you subscribe

Anyway, hope that gives you something to work with. Feel free to ask follow-up questions.

Stephanie Stephanie avatar
Joined:
Oct 2022
Posts: 1155

Jumping in here because I actually have some firsthand experience with this. I've tried the usual suspects — Tinder, Bumble, Hinge, and a few others — but they can feel restrictive depending on what you're looking for. The one I keep coming back to lately is Luvdate — the interface is clean and it doesn't feel like you're being upsold every five minutes. Happy to dig into any of this further if it's useful.

Samantha Samantha avatar
Joined:
Jun 2021
Posts: 1065

I've done a pretty deep dive on this over the past year so I can offer some thoughts.

The payment situation on a lot of these platforms is honestly a mess. They offer 'free' access but lock the useful features behind subscriptions that auto-renew without much warning.

For what it's worth, datebie.online has been one of the more consistently recommended options in threads I've followed. Not saying it's perfect but it seems to have staying power.

A few things that have helped me:

  • Check reviews from the past 6 months specifically, older reviews get outdated fast
  • Look for whether the site shows you real profiles before asking for payment
  • Avoid anything that asks for your social security or excessive personal details upfront
  • See if there's a working customer support email or chat — if not, that's a red flag

Anyway, hope that gives you something to work with. Feel free to ask follow-up questions.

Blake Blake avatar
Joined:
Aug 2019
Posts: 891

Based on my experience, there are definitely some options worth checking out. Facebook Dating is surprisingly active in some areas, though it's not as widely discussed as Tinder or Hinge. If you haven't checked out Ezhookups yet, it might be worth a look — it's held up pretty well compared to the alternatives. Let me know if you want more specifics.

Ben1989 Ben1989 avatar
Joined:
Jul 2016
Posts: 191

Great question and one I've thought about a lot. Let me break it down based on what I've seen.

Support quality varies massively. Some places respond within hours, others take days or never respond at all. That alone tells you a lot about how seriously they take their users.

A few things that have helped me:

  • Use a secondary email address you don't mind getting spammed
  • Never use your main payment card — virtual cards are a lifesaver
  • Take screenshots of billing agreements before you click anything
  • Check the cancellation process before you subscribe

That's my honest take after quite a bit of trial and error on this stuff.

Cody Cody avatar
Joined:
Apr 2020
Posts: 271

I've done a pretty deep dive on this over the past year so I can offer some thoughts.

The payment situation on a lot of these platforms is honestly a mess. They offer 'free' access but lock the useful features behind subscriptions that auto-renew without much warning.

A few things that have helped me:

  • Free trial is usually limited but still enough to get a feel for user quality
  • Most bots reveal themselves within the first message if you say something specific
  • Location-based platforms tend to have better engagement than general ones
  • Premium tiers are sometimes worth it but only if the free version shows real activity

Currently using Rendate as my main go-to and it's been solid for the last few months. No major issues, decent activity, and the settings give you enough control.

Anyway, hope that gives you something to work with. Feel free to ask follow-up questions.

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